Recently, I had a conversation with a friend about whether or not we’d ever hire someone to come in our homes to help. First thing out of my mouth was, “No, I’d never get a maid!”
Even though I knew I’d benefit from it, my Superwoman cape was temporarily blinding me from admitting what I knew was my truth.
I was busy and I needed help.
Now, I’m sure I’ve got the same list of things to do as most moms. I’ve got bathrooms to clean, floors to sweep, food to cook, clothes to wash, cheeks to kiss, noses to wipe and a litany of other daily responsibilities. And on top of that, I run a business. So I’ve got other things on my plate that can’t quite take a backseat to the primary responsibilities of my life. Yet, I’m always adding one more thing to my plate.
I’ve always had an issue saying “No.” And because of it, my list of things to do seems never ending. Just saying that powerful little word would definitely ease some of the pressure off of my life. But I’ve never wanted it look like I didn’t have it together when really, I was crumbling by the minute under the weight of self-inflicted pressure. Initially, I thought it was that I wasn’t using my time wisely or being efficient enough. So then, I’d tell myself that I’d just try harder, work longer hours, sleep less, and cut out anything that wasn’t a necessity. But that just wasn’t what I needed.
I’m not sure where I got the idea that unless I’m doing every little thing to run my home and doing everything that everyone asks of me than I’m somehow, in some way, failing. I’m sure I’m not the only one who sometimes beats themselves up if we can’t do it all. When all that does is leave us exhausted and overwhelmed.
We place this “S” on our chests and cloud our minds with the notion that we can do it all, and the truth of the matter is that no one is requiring that of us.
It’s taken me a while to really get that. And while others have no problems asking for help, I spent time stressing and feeling like I couldn’t deal. So I’ve decided that I’m giving up trying to be Superwoman. I’ve begun to realize that I’m not inadequate if I can’t get a task done. I’m human, I’m normal, I’m busy and sometimes I need help. And that’s okay. It’s okay to ask for help when I need it and certainly okay to accept it once it’s offered.
And while I’m no longer trying to do it all and be it all, I am using the extra time that I’ve carved out by asking and accepting help to hug my babies a little longer and love on my man a little harder. Being Superwoman would give me super powers and the ability to do the humanly impossible but you know what, I’m okay with just being me.
Besides, I’d much rather be Catwoman anyway.
I definitely struggle with saying no sometimes. However, I am still learning to ask for help when I need it. I realize that trying to do it all alone is tiring and stressful.
I struggle with asking for help. I’m better these days at saying no, but asking for help is hard! Requires us to humble ourselves and realize that we can’t do it all alone.
Asking for help is super hard!!!!! I didn’t even think of it as a humbling thing, but it so is. But it’s true… we can’t do it alone!