Chasing after your dreams is scary. At the end of last year, I sat down to think about what I wanted my career to look like. I know I am fortunate in that I have options. While it’s incredibly scary to not have regular paychecks coming in every two weeks, it is gratifying to be able to say, “I am going to focus on XYZ for the next year” and not have a boss tell you otherwise.
If I didn’t get comfortable with the idea of failure, I couldn’t do what I’m doing now. As the founder of this website, I get hundreds of emails from women who all want to know one thing: How do you stop being scared and start making progress? How do you get the confidence to do it? If I had to give everyone a uniform answer (based on my own experience), here is what I would say:
1. Put your library card to good use
We’re two months in 2014 and already I’ve read 8 books. Currently, I’m immersed in The Everything Store: Jeff Bezos and the Age of Amazon, about the creation of mega-retailer Amazon.com. Learning from people who have taken risks and lived to tell about it 
2. Breathe through your nose and then out your mouth.
You will get stressed out. It comes with the territory. Learn how to manage the stress or it will eat you.
3. Remember who you do this for
Over the weekend I asked my daughter what she wanted to be when she grew up. I usually ask her every month or so and it’s interesting to hear how her answer changes depending on what she’s interested in. Well, this time she shocked me by replying simply, “You.” I almost fell out my chair. Me? She wanted to be me when she grew up? Me? Really? Let me say this: my daughter isn’t the type to say something like that just to make me feel good. She’s not that concerned with my happiness. LOL.
That exchange reminded me that she is watching my every move. This is why I try to include her in my business whenever possible. (I’ve got an idea bubbling for a natural skincare line that I will name after her if I ever find the spare time to start it.) When I’m sitting there writing emails and blog posts and she asks what I’m doing, I tell her. When I have to scout locations for the next Young Mom Summit, like I’ll be doing next month, I’m taking her and her brother with me. When I tell them that they need to pursue their passions, they will have the blueprint for what that means.
4. Imagine life without failure
Imagine if you don’t go after what you want now. Imagine waking up at 59, 60, getting up at 6 a.m. to go to a job you hate. Imagine if you played it safe your entire life and ended up in a “safe” place. You’d be okay, but would you be happy?
5. Nod quietly when people tell you (because they WILL tell you) that your idea won’t work
Imagine if you decide that you’d like to be a chef. But you currently work at the local gas station for $7.95 an hour, with little to no extra money. People might ask you: How are you going to pay for culinary school? Who is going to take care of your kids while you chase these silly dreams? People will be negative and it doesn’t necessarily mean that your idea is bad. It just means those people aren’t the ones who will be on the journey with you. This is okay! Appreciate their input and move forward the best way you know how, with the right people in your corner.
6. Take the first step
Very often, momentum will take you to the finish line. But the only way to gain momentum is to just start. Buy a domain name. Go to the library and check out a book on the business you want to start. Leave the dead-end relationship that’s been holding you back. Just take one step. Then the next day or week, take one more step. Before you know it, you are out of your comfort zone. And that’s where the magic happens.
Ahhhhh, why do I forget to breathe? Thank you for this post, I believe we all need posts as such as reminders. xx
Amen amen amen. To every single point. Sharing!