{Ask YML} How Can I Get My Child’s Father To Want Me Back?

by Tiffany Treadwell-Williams

“How can I get my child’s father back so we can be a family?’’

When this topic came up on the Young Mommy Life’s Facebook page, I thought the answer to this question is so simple. But before I give this answer, let me explain who I am. I’m a mother of three and I have been married TWICE to my kids’ father. Yes, I married my ex-husband. So you see I figure what better person to answer the million dollar question but me.

As a little girl, we’ve always had the fantasy of happily ever after, because that’s all we’ve ever known. Each book your mother, father, or teacher read to you that involved a princess was a happily ever after. As adults we want the same thing. We have children with the men in our lives and we want that “family.”

Ladies, let me tell you there is nothing wrong with wanting the happily ever after—I wanted it myself. The only problem is that “happily ever after” is not always possible, and more single-parent homes have been the norm.

In all honesty, there’s no 10 steps of how to get your child’s father back in your life. There isn’t a magic wand or any voodoo to make any man want you. First, take a look at why you didn’t work out the first time. Would it be in the best interest of you and your children to be together? I can tell you if a man wants to be with you, he will tell you. If a man has told you that he doesn’t want to be with you, then you as a woman need to move on emotionally and physically. I say physically because there are too many women out here selling themselves short of still sleeping with their child’s father.

Instead of trying to win the heart of the father of your children, try being friends, and being the best parents you can be as co-parents. When you’re still stuck in the “could’ve, should’ve been,” then you can possibly be missing out on meeting an awesome guy that can be an additional great man in your children lives.