by Chic Austin
“I’m so overwhelmed.”
It was a normal day in our home but I was on the verge of tears for no apparent reason at all. I was mentally tired. At the time I was taking 4 classes, working part-time at the college, running a non-profit, and raising 3 young children on my own.
Oh, believe me, I was handling it all with a smile!
I smiled at the daycare teacher when I picked my children up 5 minutes late (again).
I smiled at my professor when I received a ‘C’ on a paper that I worked on until 4:00 am with a sick child on my lap.
I even smiled at the grocery store clerk when my card was declined because I was overdrawn on my account (again)… I smiled.
No one knew just how tired and overwhelmed I was at this point in my life…but me.
I made the TREMENDOUS mistake most of us mothers make. I expected too much.
Society adores the mother who does everything and then some. They love to see the “SUPERMOM” image of the working mother who manages to get everything done on time. Very rarely do they embrace the mother who takes a vacation day to just sit at home reading a book with a cup of tea. Oh no! That’s not American! That’s not what we stand for. WORK WORK WORK! And when you’re done working, WORK HARDER!
Today I’m telling all you mothers, to relax. I know this is taboo in our society but I’m telling you anyway.
To be a better mother you must relax. Don’t take on more jobs. Don’t finish the dishes every night. Don’t wake up at the crack of dawn on a Saturday morning just to get a head start on cleaning. Relax. Allow yourself time before the children wake up to just sit with a cup of green tea and mentally cleanse yourself.
Free yourself from society’s expectations. Free yourself from your OWN expectations. Give yourself a break. I promise you when the kids wake up and see a refreshed and relaxed mother, they’ll forgive the dirty dishes in the sink!
Chic Austin is the mother of three beautiful children and founder of From Lemons 2 Lemonade, a single parent support group.
Great post. You’re right, we expect too much of ourselves, and society expects too much of us. We need to just carve out our own expectations, and be okay with that. We were not meant to be super heroes.
Ahhhh I can SO relate!! You give great advice. I’m currently reading ‘Maxed Out: American Moms on the Brink’ for this very reason: http://www.amazon.com/Maxed-Out-American-Moms-Brink/dp/1580055230