My BFF-in-the-head Demetria Lucas, blogger at A Belle in Brooklyn and star of Bravo’s new show Blood, Sweat and Heels, recently wrote a post about a couple she knows who has sex every single day.
The wife just started a blog about their lifestyle (no pictures, but if you’re conservative the language is a little bold) and can I say I’m a new fan? Eva, the wife, writes:
Hey, we’ve gotta get it in. We have hot, spicy sex; we really do have the hots for each other. We’ve been this way since we met. I recall a time back in 1996 I wrote in my calendar, we were dating then, I wonder if we’ll hit 1000 times this year? We did, so I stopped counting.
They said they’re always ready to go because they are genuinely attracted to each other. Every night, Eva slips on lingerie and does her makeup before they get it on. Sometimes it’s kinky, other times it’s just regular sex. Even when they fight, they still make it a point to have sex. They’ve been together over 20 years and have two kids (obviously! LOL). To them, sex is a habit, like brushing their teeth or putting on a seatbelt.
For so many of us, having sex 1,000 times in one year is not only unheard of, but damn near impossible. Some of you might read this and feel a bit defensive about why there’s not more sex happening in your relationships: Well, I work a full-time job and we have a bunch of kids and dang, don’t I have the right to be tired?
But really, there’s really no need to be defensive. I think we can all learn a little something from this couple, without feeling the need to emulate their success in the bedroom (ahem):
1. You must make sex a priority if you want a satisfying sex life.
There are no ways around this. Buy yourself the new John Legend CD Love in the Future
2. Sex shouldn’t feel like a chore.
Sex is fun. It’s a stress-reliever. It’s exercise if you do it right. Sex should be the highlight of our days.
3. Get on the same page as to what a satisfying sex life looks like
If you only want to have sex once a week and your partner is cool with that, great! If twice a week works for both of you, go for it! But if you have drastically different libidos, something’s got to give.
What do you think about this couple? Who’s up for a 365 challenge? LOL
I’m in! LOL Kinda. hahaha
I think it’s great that they make an effort to have sex daily even if they get into a disagreement. I have to say though that I’m shocked by this, but rather by the lack of sex a lot of couples have. My husband and I strive to have sex on a daily basis. Sometimes, we’re not always 7 for 7 out of the week, but we come pretty darn close!
Also, I think that our mindset towards sex has a lot to with it. We don’t look at it as a chore, but more as a physical and intimate reconnection. At the end of the day, couples just have find what works for them. 365 sex isn’t practical for a lot of couples, but they should definitely take advantage of any moment that presents itself to get busy in the bedroom.
@K. Elizabeth – We probably won’t ever get to daily sex, just because we travel so much. But as much as we can, we try to make it a priority!
This is a lot…but I am up for a challenge! LOL! Not sure if daily works but we usually are good for 4 out of 7 days…I thought I was doing good! LOL!!
I read this when Demetria posted it and I’ve read the wife’s blog. Chile!!!! I commend them, I’m envious, and I’m trying to figure out if it’s even possible over here!
Firstly, let me say thank you for writing the article. Well said; however, please allow me to clarify the numbers. The 1000 mark was when we were dating, and I use to count back then. That specific number is from 1996. After that I couldn’t keep up; especially when we got married.
Secondly, for us to have sex 365 is really the norm for us. The 360 day count from last year accounts for a few serious illness, which is really the reason why I have an accurate count of the nights missed.
Thank you kindly for writing about us; we appreciate the love. I hope you continue to read about us, and follow our blog. We’re hoping to help married folks stay married…#staytuned…#blessings
I too read about this on A Belle In Brooklyn. I think it’s nice that this couple is able to connect in this way. At the same time it’s not unheard of. When I was a kid we knew a couple from church who did something similar to this. The difference is Eva’s willingness to speak about it so openly.
At the end of the day I think a couple should be well matched sexually speaking. It’s a conversation that should she be had fairly early on in a relationship. Just like money and kids and where you want to live, it’s important to have a conversation about how much sexual intimacy each person wants, needs, expects.
We’ve tried to do it everyday, and Mr. C said that I’m trying to wear him out hahahaha, so we’re not an everyday “get busy” couple but we’re pretty good during the week! I love the idea of couples being intimate with each other, and not letting things get in the way of it.